The Omnivangelist

camisuke 30 May 2008 essays/articles, videogames 3 Comments

We’ve all played tough games. Games that lead to cursing, broken controllers, broken hearts and maybe even broken consoles. I had a friend in HS who went through 3 Sega Genesis consoles over some game; perhaps it was Street of Rage, I don’t remember. But I remember the broken consoles. I loved the Genesis… so seeing 3 buried consoles hardened me.

I’ve seen quite a few tough games in my time. Here are some of them, starting from the very beginning.

1. Pitfall 2 for Atari 2600, 1982 or so. I remember severe aggravation over this game. If you get touched by any of the poison green frogs you are teleported back to your last save point, and near the very end of the game where the monkey with the shaking tail is (see photo), there is a long series of ladders with these frogs. I remember cursing at these frogs trying to climb these ladders over and over. And the monkey laughs and laughs, or looks like it. I finally made it, but it was a traumatizing youthful experience. I think I may have released anger upon frogs as a child after this.

2. Friday the 13th, 1989. This NES game just seems impossible. The worst part is when Jason attacks the campers in the cabin on the lake, and you have to row the boat all the way there, usually too late to save them. There must be some way to beat this game, but I was too young to figure it out at the time. Hopelessly frustrating. I wanted to own it so I can watch friends get pissed off playing it in futile throes of agony. Someone seems to have put the smack down for me, bless his heart: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUw3PAhpNzU

3. Ninja Gaiden for NES, 1989. Many people have cursed at this game, especially the infamous stage 6-2. It’s definitely the end stages of this game that are difficult and I certainly agree that it’s a painful experience to restart at 6-1 when dying on 6-4’s boss fight. Ouch. Who decided to do that #$@%!?

4. Ikari Warriors for NES, 1987. As I’ve said before, only a true masochist would attempt to pass this game on the paltry 3, 1-ups, that you get at the beginning of the game. This game takes hours to complete.. and you typically die dozens of times. 3 lives? Are you kidding me? Good thing they put in the “cheat” code. Just the sight of that NES cartridge evokes strong emotional responses.

5. TMNT for NES, 1989. The first parts of this game were tough, but the last few parts were truly brutal. The final hallway to get to Shredder was littered with enemies that continuously respawn if you back up to get a breather. I finally beat it, but it was relentless with the enemies until the point of slowdown and flicker.

6. Bard’s Tale 2: Destiny Knight, for Apple IIc, 1985. This game was tough because of the riddles and clues you had to solve before being able to progress. As I’ve mentioned, it took me from 7th grade (1987) until 1998 to solve this game. By that time the Apple IIc was a dinosaur but my old friend still had that machine and I had my 5.25″ floppies. When I finally got to Lagoth Zanta and his 99 Slayers, I killed him in less than 5 seconds with my 4 level 400 monks with L+ armor class and my 3 level 400 Archmages with every spell, and triple incantation of Mangar’s Mallet. How you like me now Zanta!? It was the Sage all along, that B! I must’ve paid that chump 1.5B gold pieces on various hints.

7. Ultima 5 for Apple IIc, 1988. I could’t beat this game because I didn’t have a great map of the underworld and needed the third piece of Lord British’s items (I had the sceptre from the Shadowlord’s castle, and the amulet), I think I needed the crown or something from the underworld. In any case, I had to beat this game in 2003 or so, when I had started it in 1987. Great game, 15 years. The cloth map was great and mixing reagents was awesome too. “With language like that, how did thou become an avatar?!” I admit I got sidetracked for a year entering the towns surrounding the Lord British castle, killing the guards in their sleep, running out of town saving, then coming back. No guards! The town is now mine! I also went through a pirate phase were I had 17 ships at the dock. But pirates stole them so fast my head was spinning. Those rapscallions!

8. Tomb Raider, PS, 1996. I died mucho times on this gem of a game. But I remember at least a couple dozen deaths just trying to escape the final stage.

9. God Hand, 2007. Great game, but tough, even on easy setting. My hands get sore wrestling with the contoller on this beast. The taunts and humiliation you endure this game are what makes legend.

Other notable games that I’ve played but have not beaten yet are DMC and Shinobi/Nightshade.

What tough games have you played? Share your experiences of frustration! Please Vent!